I'm looking around for a new-to-me 1:1 car. I'm pretty focused which cars I fancy, what options and colours I'd ideally like. ....And definitely sure of the options and colours I don't like on certain of my favoured cars.
So, here's my rant for today.......... Advertisers, both trade and private who try to big-up their wares by putting in the
ad:-
"The best colour" or
"Best colour combo". That's your opinion, sunshine. Don't expect me to agree (I rarely do).
"Heavy on spec.". So it might be, but most of what the original owner shelled-out for doesn't interest me. So I'm unlikely to want to buy your car.
"Over £9k of options". See above. ....And it doesn't make your car worth very much more than average 2 more owners and 70k miles down the line.
"Pulls like a train". I won't be buying that one, either. You've obviously ragged it on a regular basis.
"Full service history". Unless you have invoices to back-up the stamps in the service book, I don't believe you. I'm fully aware how easy it is for sellers to buy a new service book and get it stamped.
"Looks mint on newly refurbed black rims". No, it looks like you ram-raided Halfords, actually. (In truth, if the main picture shows the black wheels I don't even read the ad.)
"Fully loaded!" Really?? .......Where's the satnav, the sunroof, the sport seats, the leather interior? This car's the bargain-basement spec. Oh! I get it.......... The engine's about to go BANG!
"We want your part-exchange". You haven't seen the car I'm running at the minute, Dude. I'd rather you knock a couple of large off the price and I'll get what I can for mine locally, thanks.
"Silky-smooth V6 engine". I hope not, it's a BMW. They don't make V6s. Won't be buying off you, then. Obviously don't know what you're selling. (........And this was a bona-fide dealer. A national chain!)
"Rare!" Really? Have you checked the website you're selling on? Every other car of that model on here has the same spec. It was the most popular option pack they sold.
"Full-on 300bhp remap". I've 2 issues with this one - Have you got a dyno print-out to back-up your quoted figure? ....And you sound like the stereotypical boy-racer. So I won't be buying
your car, either.
(This one's BMW-specific)
"Individual". OK, so the original owner had far more money than sense or taste. That colour combination makes me want to vomit. Hold on, did you say the original owner was colour-blind? Best of luck selling that one, Dude.
(The list is endless, and I'm bored of all this typing now. I'm off to bed.)
Come on sellers, cut the c.r.a.p. Most of the time you're just making yourself look stupid.