SlotForum banner

GOGS...Grumpy Old Gits Society..

333072 Views 8283 Replies 133 Participants Last post by  Gripping Pneus
after all the years of suffering being called a miserable old bar-steward by mrs zz , I am finally rejoicing that she has come round to my way of thinking. the source of this wonderment?... a newly found joint loathing of the foul phenomenon of otherwise seemingly intelligent individuals starting a sentence with the word "so"!!!! if you have been asked , "how do you propose to re-attach that button"? , or , "what method would you use to distribute seed in your garden" , fair enough but otherwise , nooooooooooo! other current hot favourites are "yoofs" with their kecks hanging out the top of their trousers and newly qualified drivers with a green p plate (clearly designating pillock) who refuse to commit to crossing a roundabout without having received a written invitation at least a fortnight in advance! what gets your hackles up?
  • Like
Reactions: 1
1621 - 1640 of 8284 Posts
Then there are the people who let their car run to warm up or cool down for 30 minutes and the old rule of it takes more fuel to start a car than to let it run (only true if the car has been off for mare than 10 minutes).
A bloke I know starts his car and leaves it idling while he washes & dries it, which usually takes him the thick-end of an hour.

I would say that he washes his car at least twice a week, even when it's not noticeably dirty.
See less See more
Here in Germany they kind of over do it IMHO. It is against the law to let a car idle more than 3 minutes (assuming you are not in one of the 50 km long traffic jams...).

Having been raised in the Great White North of the US I do break that law when there is ice and snow on the car.

Because it is a diesel it takes a long time to warm up.

So, if I followed the law I would free it of ice and snow, then get in and fire up the engine.

The thing is the human body is about 60% water so when I get in, unless I hold my breath I can't see a damn thing because of the windows being fogged up.

So I start the engine, scrape of the ice and snow and THEN get in the the car.

Mind you, I have de-icing down to an art and can get the whole car done within 5 minutes... (I usually have the windshield and back window covered so I only have to do the sides...)

I understand the point of the law but physics mean I will probably harm someone else or myself because I can't see anything.

Also the battery needs time to recharge and given our trips tend to be in the 50 km range I fool myself into thinking that I am giving it time to recharge "properly"..
See less See more
Well, who'd have thought I'd be posting here!

Last week my wife was unfortunate to be rear-ended whilst waiting in a queue. Fair play, the guy owned up so his insurers pulled their finger out and yesterday she took it to the body shop. Not local, 20 or so miles away.

A hire car had been arranged, my wife was quite specific, it must be auto, have sat navigation and be mid sized( she drives an Audi pool car from work, S3 saloon, A6 Avant, or Q5, depends on her and other staffs requirements ) she drives upwards of 800 miles a week
So the rental company turn up almost an hour later than they said, with a Vauxhall mokka. Basically a micro SUV, but not 4x4.
Guess what ? Manual, no sat nav, no cruise control!!!

SWMBO chooses to drive auto because of a recurring problem with her left should due to a riding accident.
She sends the guy off with a flea in his ear, so another wait and the guy turns up with an A class Mercedes. OK!

No! What idiot designed the cockpit of the Mercedes?????

The gear shift is where the wiper stalk sits on every other brand of car! How amazingly stupid is that? What possessed them to come up with that idea. Now I've driven pretty much every mainstream brand of car and the wipes are always on the right, on modern cars anyway.

So after a couple of shifts to neutral, while trying to deploy the wipers she pulled over, called them and has insisted on another brand of car

Now my wife is blonde, but she can drive! She worked in the motor trade for 10 yrs, and is a qualified off-road driving instructor, her father was a driving instructor when she was born, until a couple of years ago My wife is 53.
See less See more
Sorry I was unable to edit the last post, so....

now I'm gonna grump about my Samsung tablet!
Why am I unable to scroll down , when the text is deeper the little box we use to post in


Presumably the same cretin who when designing the SLK cockpit layout decided to put the indicator stalk at 7 o clock, and the cruise control stalk at 10 o clock with up/down adjusting the cars speed in intervals of 10mph whether you were in cruise control or not.

I had my Fathers one on loan for a few weeks after my Fiat Abarth was stolen, it caused a fair few WHisky Tango Foxtrot is it doing? text messages on the day I collected it, and a very hairy moment when indicating right in some S-bends when the car decided that what I really wanted to do is lurch up 10mph rather than signal intention to turn right.
The gear shift is where the wiper stalk sits on every other brand of car! How amazingly stupid is that? What possessed them to come up with that idea.
We have a fleet of the latest model Sprinter vans at work. They are exactly the same. Bloody stupid idea.
As I do far more miles for work than I do privately in my X3, I'm forever activating the wipers in the car when I really want to be selecting drive, neutral, reverse or park.
Now, you could say that as an advanced driver (IAM) I shouldn't do it..........

Anyway, my grump for the day is cats.......... Again!

We're surrounded by the bloody vermin.
All our neighbours have multiple cats. The cats never "do their business" in their own gardens, so we have a total of 8 which are almost constantly in our garden. I've got sonic animal repellers, but they don't cover the whole garden - and one cat in particular must be deaf, because it ignores them.
See less See more
Reverse psychology... we have just stolen borrowed a cat from 2 doors away. It now owns our garden and we treat it sweet. Its her hunting ground (not that she has caught anything) and now we have no cat mess, no other cats come near her territory. She spends all day guarding her turf and then goes home in the evening to eat. win-win!
Our three cats all bury their mess very carefully. It then rots and feed the plants, another win win situation

Oh and they don't catch birds just the pesky mice and rats that plague us as we are in a farming community. Another win.

And they sleep on my feet and keep them warm at night. They do eat though so there is a price to pay.

All better than those bloody dogs that bark continuously and chase everything in sight when they are off the lead. A right nuisance they are.
See less See more
  • Like
Reactions: 1
I had a Renault a good few years ago with the lights and wiper levers the wrong way round but finally got used to it. For the last 15 years I have had Kia Picanto's. The first one which I had for just under 14 years also had the leavers the wrong way round, think it is a far eastern thing. No problems until I wanted to give someone a reaction flash of the lights and I would clean the windscreen instead. My new Picanto has the leavers the "correct" way around and guess what, when I do a reaction light flash I clean the windscreen instead.
  • Like
Reactions: 2
After a long holiday weekend my wife and I have just returned from a trip to 'the Coast' which in our case meant a trip across Arthurs Pass from one side of the South Island to the other. We were happily cruising along at about 95-100kph until approaching Porters Pass we caught up with a few 'slow coaches' (nothing to do with buses) and managed to pick them off one by one. Almost at the bottom of the Pass we caught up with another and I figured I have a couple of k's to pass him before the next windy section. With him and the windy section behind us we were now on the Canterbury Plains and I settled down to 100kph on a very long slightly downhill straight and wondered how long it would take for him to catch up with us. As I noticed him come over the brow almost 1 km behind me, I also noticed a dark blue car parked on the opposite side of the road about 1 km ahead of us. I thought he would take quite some time to catch us but needless to say this guy wanted to show me how fast he could go and I watched him hauling us in at a good rate of knots. As we passed the dark blue Holden I noticed a man with a high vis green jacket and an insignia on his shirt sleeve sitting in it and the following car was still gaining on us very quickly. He came past the unmarked Police car and then passed us approx. 40kph faster than we were going. Red and blue lights started flashing and the Police car did a U-turn, caught up and passed us in seconds and was off to do some writing or whatever they do these days. The perfect trap. That brought a smile to my face.
See less See more
  • Like
Reactions: 2
The perfect trap. That brought a smile to my face.
Wot a rotter you are. Teehee
See less See more
What is it with certain groups of people wanting to erase history just because they find it distasteful? This has been brought to my mind again in the last few days because a certain popular Christmas song has been re-written due to some people sensing that it alludes to a rape or assault. I'm not, for one nano-second, suggesting that assaults of any nature are OK - they most definitely aren't. The song has been a part of popular culture since the mid-'40s, and as such has historical merit. To suggest that it would either encourage men to assault women, or somehow demean women who have been victims of assault, is - to me - nothing short of ludicrous. The words of the song had a different meaning 70-odd years ago. The world then was a much more innocent place. For example;- the woman says she ought to leave because it wasn't the done-thing for single men & women to be alone together - particularly if they're drinking alcohol.
Not because she doesn't want to be there, but she's worried what other people will think if they find-out.


To want the song gone because you've put your own 21st Century spin on the lyric is nonsensical. Whatever next?? Will wars be redacted from history books because innocent people got killed?

Thought for the day......... Does the world get a little crazier every day? It does, if you ask me.
See less See more
  • Like
Reactions: 2
Pop songs are a minefield, Stuart. Both the Tom Jones hit "Dililah" and Queen's "Bohiemian Rhapsody" are about 'fessing up to murders!

Stoke City fans may remove the murder element from "Delilah" but replace it with an innuendo. ;) :p

As an American historian said, "Are we going to tear down every statue and burn every book?" ... Pointing out that book burning has an unsavoury history to put it mildly.

It's a well known saying that those who don't learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.

Apologies for getting too dark ....
I was on a shortish road trip ( about 1.5 hours) and selected a road trip song playlist on Spotify... Heart of Rock and Roll by Huey Lewis and the News came on and I also realized how some of the lines in that are no way appropriate any more...
I see what you mean. Heart's All I Wanna Do infamously caused them to be at the centre of a controversy, apparently people take life style advice from '***-lighter' rock songs?
Hahahahaha has anyone tried to tell the better half to Shake Rattle and Roll and get out to that kitchen and rattle those pots and pans in todays world , like Bill Haley did in the late 50,s , a song is a song some you like some you don't , and how about Chuck's little Queenie , tell me who,s the queen standing over by the record machine, today you could upseT many in the pc world including her majesty , god i need a large one , oh better explain in case somebody thinks it means something it ain't .



See less See more
  • Like
Reactions: 1
A couple of songs that the Beeb didn't ban in the late 60's and early 70's have always surprised me.

In 1972 they banned C Moon by Wings but not Walk on The Wild Side by Lou Reed and in the late 60's broadcast what would become the Lemon Song and later released it on CD. Check out the lyrics on line. All this at a time of high censorship. Did the Beeb not understand the meaning of these??

I have always thought the best form of censorship is the channel change or off buttons. Just because I don't approve doesn't mean everyone disapproves.
As it's now November, has anyone spotted Easter eggs in the shops yet?
I can remember Walk on the Wild Side being used as the background music on the local TV news back in the 1980s for any feel good report that involved wildlife. One that sticks in the mind was about a bloody squirrel sanctuary of all things with footage of squirrels running around to doob-da-doob dooba-doob da-doob...

Of course these days it would fall foul of the phrase the colored girls...
1621 - 1640 of 8284 Posts