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Well,here it is,after much searching throught the dusty(Koff Wheeze)archives of the Old Weird Herald,I finally found my motor break in procedure article.
Please note,that no Polar Bears were harmed in any way in the production of this article.
Enjoy,and Learn Eh!
As a preamble,let me explain,that the orriginal topic started out as a discussion about Brush Spring Tension in Slot Car Motors.
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Light,Medium,or Heavey????I think the excessive Brush wear comes from breaking motors in using too Heavey a Spring Water.I only use Light,and sometimes on rare occasaions,medium Spring Water.I find using Lighter Water Tension,for breaking brushes in is less harmfull on brush wear,while still giving adequette break in properties.
I produce my own Light Tension Water,using 3 Coil Still Technollogy.I know there are some missguided souls out ther that still cling to anachronistic 5 Coil Stills,but I think this produces a Heavier Water with too much Tension,and hence very rapid brush wear.3 Coils,I think are really the only way to go if you want to relieve your Break in Tension.
Actually,this is all rather Passe now,and for some time now I have been working on new Breakthrough Breakin Technollogy,in secret collaboration with none other than Ernie Mozorelli.Our results,are soon to be released,in an Official White Paper(or maybe Blue,or Green,How about a nice MauveLavender) to the Board of Directors,of the Institute For Motor Break In Procedures,henceforth to be refered to as the IFMBIP(proper pronunciation,If em bip)
Although the findings are not quite finished,and a final Draft is still being pulled,I have been authorised by both Ernie,Myself,and the Board Members of IFMBIP to release a few sketchy details,so here goes.
In a word;Beer.Yes,that's right Beer.And not just your ordinary every day Pee on a Plate stuff,we're talking about real Canadian Brew here.
Molson's Canadian Lager Beer to be exact.After years of research,and countless cases(both 24,and twelve packs),relentlessly testing bottle after bottle,can after can.We tested Brand(hick!!!) after Brand(hick!!!!!)Night after sleepless(in Toronto)night.No expense was spared.
All tests were standardised for akurassy,and although,we cannot divulge exact proceedures(pending outcome of certain litigational dissputations),we can catagorically state,that,no persons,either dead or alive,were seriously injured during these long and arduous experiments.
In short,Beer works.I won't bother you with the details,that will all be published in a Final Report to be submitted to the IFMBIP Subcommittee for Preapproval to the Sub Subcommittee for Product and Proceedural Evalluations,necessary before being put before the Steering Committee to be put to a Vote(fortunately,the Steering Subcommittee was able to purchase,at a Very Reasonable price,some used Voting Machines from an unknown Source.Allegedly,from one of your Southern most States,but this Highly Unlikely Rumour remains Unsubstantiated at this piont),before proceeding to an Environmentall Discussion Group to study the highly charged Subject of Pollar Ionisation occuring from Running Slot Car Motors in Beer,and more Importantly,Whether in fact Pollar Bears will still Drink Beer treated in this manner(my Gut Feeling,is that they Will).
All this should take no more than 7 or 8 years(provided certain Fast Tracking takes place.You know,a few well placed Bribes Etc( You didn't hear that from Me EH!)
To Be Continued.BWA
It's all TRUE,and I have Corroberating Evidence,and Test Reports,done by Independant Testing Labs(Run by my brother in law Guido Geoseppi.A totally dedicated,and uninfluencable honest guy.(How's the new Viper doin Guido EH!).All these tests are obtainable,Absolutely FREE,Just send 132.56US,to cover Shipping and Handling(including Bribes ,Payolla,ETC.)To Guido,at
613 Rock Crush Lane
The Big House
Weazel Piss,Nebraska
98210
It apears,that Guido is on Extended Hollidays,at the Taxpayers expense.I didn't get the whole story,but there was some thing about falsified test reports,clinical trials on Pollar Bears and Tainted Beer.Guido can tell you better than I can.Oh yeah,I think the IRS had some questions about unexplained large sums of money,and a New Viper.But I don't know how much truth there is to any of that.However,Guido does asure me that All the Tests and Research into running motors in in Beer are 100% accurate,and totally unbiased.And if you can't tust a brother in law,who the heck can you trust,EH!
More later EH!
BWA(BearWasAlchohollic)
Please note,that no Polar Bears were harmed in any way in the production of this article.
Enjoy,and Learn Eh!
As a preamble,let me explain,that the orriginal topic started out as a discussion about Brush Spring Tension in Slot Car Motors.
Light,Medium,or Heavey????I think the excessive Brush wear comes from breaking motors in using too Heavey a Spring Water.I only use Light,and sometimes on rare occasaions,medium Spring Water.I find using Lighter Water Tension,for breaking brushes in is less harmfull on brush wear,while still giving adequette break in properties.
I produce my own Light Tension Water,using 3 Coil Still Technollogy.I know there are some missguided souls out ther that still cling to anachronistic 5 Coil Stills,but I think this produces a Heavier Water with too much Tension,and hence very rapid brush wear.3 Coils,I think are really the only way to go if you want to relieve your Break in Tension.
Actually,this is all rather Passe now,and for some time now I have been working on new Breakthrough Breakin Technollogy,in secret collaboration with none other than Ernie Mozorelli.Our results,are soon to be released,in an Official White Paper(or maybe Blue,or Green,How about a nice MauveLavender) to the Board of Directors,of the Institute For Motor Break In Procedures,henceforth to be refered to as the IFMBIP(proper pronunciation,If em bip)
Although the findings are not quite finished,and a final Draft is still being pulled,I have been authorised by both Ernie,Myself,and the Board Members of IFMBIP to release a few sketchy details,so here goes.
In a word;Beer.Yes,that's right Beer.And not just your ordinary every day Pee on a Plate stuff,we're talking about real Canadian Brew here.
Molson's Canadian Lager Beer to be exact.After years of research,and countless cases(both 24,and twelve packs),relentlessly testing bottle after bottle,can after can.We tested Brand(hick!!!) after Brand(hick!!!!!)Night after sleepless(in Toronto)night.No expense was spared.
All tests were standardised for akurassy,and although,we cannot divulge exact proceedures(pending outcome of certain litigational dissputations),we can catagorically state,that,no persons,either dead or alive,were seriously injured during these long and arduous experiments.
In short,Beer works.I won't bother you with the details,that will all be published in a Final Report to be submitted to the IFMBIP Subcommittee for Preapproval to the Sub Subcommittee for Product and Proceedural Evalluations,necessary before being put before the Steering Committee to be put to a Vote(fortunately,the Steering Subcommittee was able to purchase,at a Very Reasonable price,some used Voting Machines from an unknown Source.Allegedly,from one of your Southern most States,but this Highly Unlikely Rumour remains Unsubstantiated at this piont),before proceeding to an Environmentall Discussion Group to study the highly charged Subject of Pollar Ionisation occuring from Running Slot Car Motors in Beer,and more Importantly,Whether in fact Pollar Bears will still Drink Beer treated in this manner(my Gut Feeling,is that they Will).
All this should take no more than 7 or 8 years(provided certain Fast Tracking takes place.You know,a few well placed Bribes Etc( You didn't hear that from Me EH!)
To Be Continued.BWA
It's all TRUE,and I have Corroberating Evidence,and Test Reports,done by Independant Testing Labs(Run by my brother in law Guido Geoseppi.A totally dedicated,and uninfluencable honest guy.(How's the new Viper doin Guido EH!).All these tests are obtainable,Absolutely FREE,Just send 132.56US,to cover Shipping and Handling(including Bribes ,Payolla,ETC.)To Guido,at
613 Rock Crush Lane
The Big House
Weazel Piss,Nebraska
98210
It apears,that Guido is on Extended Hollidays,at the Taxpayers expense.I didn't get the whole story,but there was some thing about falsified test reports,clinical trials on Pollar Bears and Tainted Beer.Guido can tell you better than I can.Oh yeah,I think the IRS had some questions about unexplained large sums of money,and a New Viper.But I don't know how much truth there is to any of that.However,Guido does asure me that All the Tests and Research into running motors in in Beer are 100% accurate,and totally unbiased.And if you can't tust a brother in law,who the heck can you trust,EH!
More later EH!
BWA(BearWasAlchohollic)
