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Senior Slot Car Mechanic
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Well,here it is,after much searching throught the dusty(Koff Wheeze)archives of the Old Weird Herald,I finally found my motor break in procedure article.

Please note,that no Polar Bears were harmed in any way in the production of this article.

Enjoy,and Learn Eh!

As a preamble,let me explain,that the orriginal topic started out as a discussion about Brush Spring Tension in Slot Car Motors.



Light,Medium,or Heavey????I think the excessive Brush wear comes from breaking motors in using too Heavey a Spring Water.I only use Light,and sometimes on rare occasaions,medium Spring Water.I find using Lighter Water Tension,for breaking brushes in is less harmfull on brush wear,while still giving adequette break in properties.

I produce my own Light Tension Water,using 3 Coil Still Technollogy.I know there are some missguided souls out ther that still cling to anachronistic 5 Coil Stills,but I think this produces a Heavier Water with too much Tension,and hence very rapid brush wear.3 Coils,I think are really the only way to go if you want to relieve your Break in Tension.

Actually,this is all rather Passe now,and for some time now I have been working on new Breakthrough Breakin Technollogy,in secret collaboration with none other than Ernie Mozorelli.Our results,are soon to be released,in an Official White Paper(or maybe Blue,or Green,How about a nice MauveLavender) to the Board of Directors,of the Institute For Motor Break In Procedures,henceforth to be refered to as the IFMBIP(proper pronunciation,If em bip)

Although the findings are not quite finished,and a final Draft is still being pulled,I have been authorised by both Ernie,Myself,and the Board Members of IFMBIP to release a few sketchy details,so here goes.

In a word;Beer.Yes,that's right Beer.And not just your ordinary every day Pee on a Plate stuff,we're talking about real Canadian Brew here.
Molson's Canadian Lager Beer to be exact.After years of research,and countless cases(both 24,and twelve packs),relentlessly testing bottle after bottle,can after can.We tested Brand(hick!!!) after Brand(hick!!!!!)Night after sleepless(in Toronto)night.No expense was spared.

All tests were standardised for akurassy,and although,we cannot divulge exact proceedures(pending outcome of certain litigational dissputations),we can catagorically state,that,no persons,either dead or alive,were seriously injured during these long and arduous experiments.

In short,Beer works.I won't bother you with the details,that will all be published in a Final Report to be submitted to the IFMBIP Subcommittee for Preapproval to the Sub Subcommittee for Product and Proceedural Evalluations,necessary before being put before the Steering Committee to be put to a Vote(fortunately,the Steering Subcommittee was able to purchase,at a Very Reasonable price,some used Voting Machines from an unknown Source.Allegedly,from one of your Southern most States,but this Highly Unlikely Rumour remains Unsubstantiated at this piont),before proceeding to an Environmentall Discussion Group to study the highly charged Subject of Pollar Ionisation occuring from Running Slot Car Motors in Beer,and more Importantly,Whether in fact Pollar Bears will still Drink Beer treated in this manner(my Gut Feeling,is that they Will).

All this should take no more than 7 or 8 years(provided certain Fast Tracking takes place.You know,a few well placed Bribes Etc( You didn't hear that from Me EH!)

To Be Continued.BWA

It's all TRUE,and I have Corroberating Evidence,and Test Reports,done by Independant Testing Labs(Run by my brother in law Guido Geoseppi.A totally dedicated,and uninfluencable honest guy.(How's the new Viper doin Guido EH!).All these tests are obtainable,Absolutely FREE,Just send 132.56US,to cover Shipping and Handling(including Bribes ,Payolla,ETC.)To Guido,at

613 Rock Crush Lane
The Big House
Weazel Piss,Nebraska
98210

It apears,that Guido is on Extended Hollidays,at the Taxpayers expense.I didn't get the whole story,but there was some thing about falsified test reports,clinical trials on Pollar Bears and Tainted Beer.Guido can tell you better than I can.Oh yeah,I think the IRS had some questions about unexplained large sums of money,and a New Viper.But I don't know how much truth there is to any of that.However,Guido does asure me that All the Tests and Research into running motors in in Beer are 100% accurate,and totally unbiased.And if you can't tust a brother in law,who the heck can you trust,EH!

More later EH!

BWA(BearWasAlchohollic)
 

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LOL!
I remember that from when I first joined OWH over 3 years ago!
How in the heck did you manage to dig it up, Al?
Searching is a nightmare in there and it is a treasure trove of great info and humour too.
Maybe you found a copy somewhere else?
Thanks for reproducing it, although I would bet most of these youngsters have no idea of what it's all about!
 

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Just what can you expect out of a Canadian wasted on Polar bear beer swill.

Any decent motor builder will confirm that good Chardonnay wine works best for breaking in the builder, let the motors fend for them selves with cheap red wine with lots of tanic acid and settlement to cut the brushes down right. Besides it gives the endbells a good red dye job.
 

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Premium Member
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5,400 Posts
Aw, no fair. I was thinking of getting some serious insight here. Now I'm not sure if I should try the red wine or not.

Hell, I've tried everything else, running motors; underwater, backwards slowly, backwards fast, at high voltage, at low voltage, with a carbon bush buster and I've bent the brushes on a SCX can this way and that... only thing that seems to really work is running the car in races, on the track, as the great Slot God intended.
 

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Allan Wakefield
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5,857 Posts
I thought we were in for a treat from MR BWA too there for a moment.

A treat as in a lesson on Motors, it was still a treat ( what were you guys ON??? ) but not what I expected.

So who IS going to step up and do the first 'how to' on the forum?

The Subject could be ' Initial out of box set up of RTR 1/32 cars'

Anyone?
 

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Senior Slot Car Mechanic
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2,230 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
As an added update,I now use MooseHead beer exclusively.Honest,I wouldn't make this stuff up ya know
 
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