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Signs of getting old and watching day time telly where the ads tell you, you have erectile dysfunction, how much your funeral will cost, cheap cremations, you need this and that vitamin,, you need a electric buggy to scare the S out of people at 10 mph taking capital on your house so you can afford to enjoy life in old age , with erectile dysfunction, pay in advance to be cremated or your funeral, to be able to afford all those vitamins you need.
What ever happened to that retirement the politicians told us we can have , holidays in the sun where you still have erectile dysfunction, enjoy nights out dancing with stiff joints , eat out with friends where you don't know who is passing wind, ah great getting old.
 

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It disappeared when it came to fruition that they didn't allow for people to live as long in their Calculations despite life span being on the rise for years and not a sudden occurance so the buffer that was expected for when the Baby Boomers hit retirement wasn't there.
I've been resolved to the fact even pre injury that I'll never likely retire and I'll be lucky if my Children can or even maybe theirs.

And before anyone feels attacked, it's not your fault as everyone has a right to a long and full life, it's on our goverments for not managing things as they should.
 

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"What ever happened to that retirement the politicians told us we can have"

"Oh that!" Actually it's simple math.

We failed to shoot every third one of them, and hand the remaining two shovels. In the meantime, the lyen' piles of fertilizer guaranteed your retirement unto themselves.
 

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Problem is you shoot one two more will take their place, the rich and the corrupt will always be there as long as there's money to attract them.
 

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Until I switched on BBC Radio 3 a few minutes ago, I didn't know that today is a national holiday in Britain. Can't imagine how it might make a difference from any other day.
Is this a compromise between pirate radio and classical?

 

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Sorry, but after a long shift at work I CBA trawling through 5-and-a-bit pages and 110 posts. Has anyone posted this sign of old age?..............

You have 10,000 times the number of working hair follicles on your face and neck than you do on your head.
 
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My Mrs would probably say my Backside does too which is probably why old Wayne Rooney went for folicle transplant from there, his Backside not mine, or possibly he just wanted to be more of an a**e.
 

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Brittle rib cartilage breaks instead of flexes. Was wedged under a sink replacing faucets, with my hip on the floor and side of chest resting on the edge of the bottom shelf when with an audible crack my torso dropped a millimeter or two. My yelp summoned the hound from the other end of the house.
 

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Open the sliding gate on the driveway enough to get the motorbike out, then backed the truck into the gate!
 

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Get up, get washed and dressed, have breakfast, do chores and receive "Orders" from Mother.

"I want you to go to the shops for a 1/4 lbs of smoked ham, and while you're at it, post this letter. And don't forget the change".

Do as "Ordered", proceed to shops money tightly clutched in hand, purchase said sandwich filler, post letter....simples as Sergey would say.

Half way home I sense something is not quite right, but it takes a few more minutes and another couple hundred yards to realise the problem after replaying the previous half hour through my addled brain, right upto the point I raise my hand to check the smoked ham is secure in its wrapping, only to see before me............

You guessed it.....the letter!
Dohhhh!!

In my day dreaming I had only gone an posted the 1/4 lb of smoked ham instead of intended letter.

Retracing my steps at a high rate of speed I was fortunate to arrive back at the letter box just as Posty arrived to carry out his daily collection.
Imagine the look on his face when I asked him if I could retrieve the sandwich filler and exchange it for the letter in my other hand.

Thankfully he smiled and agreed all while shaking his head in disbelief. Also the smoked ham did not have the all important postage stamp, so would not have gotten too far within the Royal Mail system.

I'm pretty sure he took pity on me as I was only 7 years old at the time (my Brother who was with me was 9).

Needless to say, other slight mishaps have occured through life which always have the funny side to them, and due to starting at such an early age, I just put down to being nothing other than.......

Normal!!
 

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Brittle rib cartilage breaks instead of flexes. Was wedged under a sink replacing faucets, with my hip on the floor and side of chest resting on the edge of the bottom shelf when with an audible crack my torso dropped a millimeter or two. My yelp summoned the hound from the other end of the house.
Ouch, hope you're alright and it heals up without too much trouble.
 

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Discussion Starter · #118 ·
And, to add to MT:s post above - one of my tricks is washing my hands and face having forgotten to remove my specs.
 

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Two motoring-related signs of old age, from my perspective..........

Pouring scorn on run-of-the-mill family cars that come out of the factory with so many huuuuuge dummy vents/extractors/exhaust-tips that they look as if they've ram-raided the local Halfords. WTAF??? 😕

Buying an SUV because folding yourself into (....and unfolding yourself out of) a run-of-the-mill family car became too painful.
 

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Discussion Starter · #120 ·
Stu

A sign of really advanced old age is when you can't identify the manufacturers of such cars even after looking at the bonnet badges.

I usually stick to my general rule of: If in doubt, it's probably a Daewoo.

If it matters, which is not admitted...
 
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